The UK Government wants the country to become Broadband Britain - a nation at the cutting edge of the new high-speed internet age. BBC News Online's Mike Smartt decided to do his bit by signing up for British Telecom's ADSL package.
Advertising suggests an exhilarating new world of connectivity; bobsleighs careering downhill at breakneck speed.

The message is the internet is dangerously fast if you sign up.

But life with BT Openworld broadband can more closely resemble a horse and cart going uphill backwards.

And the danger consists of the risk of serious injury from repeatedly striking your head against a wall in frustration.

I ordered ADSL broadband from BT in March and was offered the services of an engineer.

But a colleague told me of four visits by BT employees to his flat before successful connection was achieved - one of them emerging from beneath my friend's desk to inquire if it really was ADSL he was supposed to be fitting - so I decided instead to go for the do-it-yourself, plug-and-go option.

After all, I've fitted hard disks and memory in my PC, so it couldn't be that difficult - and so it proved.

But that would have to wait until my broadband connection was made live by BT at my local exchange.

What happened? Not a lot

A couple of weeks later my plug-and-go kit arrived. But nothing happened at the exchange.

The order had been cancelled, explained BT. Not by me, I told them. A new date was arranged.

It too came and went and still no broadband. The order had been cancelled, they said. Not by me, I told them again.

"Ah, sorry," said the nice Scottish call-centre lady. "Our computer keeps doing that, cancelling orders for no apparent reason. I'll give you a ring every day until we have a new date." No call ever came.

Weeks passed before BT informed me that broadband capacity at my exchange was now full. This was surprising as the small south-west Surrey town where I live is hardly the UK's Silicon Valley.

Then, finally, BT assured me of a definite, immovable switch-on date.

I unpacked the modem and the splitters (which you attach to every phone line in the house to allow ordinary calls - and standard dial-up Internet connection - at the same time as using always-on ADSL) and loaded the BT Openworld software. An orange light appeared on the modem. But no internet.

What support?

It was at this point that I first encountered what BT Openworld calls its broadband support.

This is an 0845 number which connects fine, then the caller is given two lists of options to technical support. It is only after making these choices that the engaged sound kicks in (don't worry, it will).

The only way to get to technical support is to keep dialling, then navigate the two options menus and hope the engaged sound is replaced by ringing.

On this first occasion, on a Saturday morning (currently I only use the broadband connection at weekends), I must have dialled 30 times - presumably each at the cost of a local call - before, joy of joys, the engaged tone was eventually replaced by ringing.

But that just allows you to join the "All our support staff are busy - please hold on. We apologise for the inconvenience" queue, which lasted - on this occasion - just under 35 minutes. Total time to speak to support: one hour and 15 minutes.

"Your orange light should be green if there's a connection," said another Scottish lady. But she couldn't help, so she would report the fact to the engineers.

Weekdays only please

However, unlike many of the people paying for fast Internet access who do, the engineers don't work weekends. So nothing could be done until Monday.

Left to my own devices, I swapped the splitter on my telephone line and - bingo - green at last. One of the two splitters provided by BT was clearly faulty: Openworld support please note for future reference.

Connection was successful. Speed was fantastic. Pages loaded instantly. The bobsleigh was gathering speed. Until I tried to enter my e-mail account management area.

This requires a password - the same as the one used for logging on. And it wouldn't work. So, again, I started the long process of dialling BT Broadband support. Just over an hour later (and another big phone bill?), technical support and I made contact and together we changed passwords.

The problem seemed partially fixed - one e-mail account worked and, inexplicably as it uses the same password, my second didn't.

Very polite

Another nice Scottish lady (they're all very polite and accommodating when you eventually get through) promised I would be phoned when it was fixed. Not before Monday, of course.

You've guessed it - no call ever arrived. And the following Saturday, the whole system wouldn't let me in at all. The new password was rejected.

One hour and 40 minutes to get through to technical support, who said they couldn't help. It was down to order support or some such department (I was almost past caring). And no, they don't work weekends.

It's Thursday now and order support have told me the problem was something to do with "fusion" (I was getting near to going nuclear). Everything should now work. Of course, when I try it on Saturday and it doesn't work...

None of this gives me any pleasure to report. Britain is behind many parts of Europe with broadband rollout, which many are convinced is essential for the country's economic wellbeing.

I could have chosen another broadband provider. But I don't have the choice of cable so BT would still have had to enable the exchange connection, with its order-cancelling computer.

Slashing broadband prices is probably making the situation worse, as orders for connections have apparently doubled in recent months, which is further overloading the system.

BT has a lot to answer for. That's when you can get through.

jacke 好久不见！ 你消失了？

Quote (xp @ July 02 2002,00:29)

jacke 好久不见！ 你消失了？

哪里，这不又重出江湖了嘛...